Getting There!

 
  Another week down, and only 7 more to go. I must say, this go around, time is flying by. Appetite has been well controlled but I did have a curve ball thrown to me this week. My husband and I had the opportunity to take the boys to a private party at Six Flags. Couldn't pass it up. I have been dreading taking a 6 and a 4 year old and standing in long lines. So the obvious choice was to go at a time when there would be no lines. So we did. I ate a normal breakfast, snack, and lunch at 11am before they opened. I took 2 Special K bars in with me for snacks. That's not on my diet, but better than a thousand other things I could put in my mouth. When lunch time came around I had a small slice of pizza and ate every one's left over pizza crust. I figured that would be a better choice than another slice loaded with cheese and pepperoni. I think I went wrong by drinking soda throughout the day. To be honest, paying 3.50 for a bottled water was not what I wanted to do, so I drank from my husbands refillable cup all day. Not a good thing. That evening I had a quarter of my husbands omelet from Denny's and 1 and a half pancakes. Yes, they were huge. I enjoyed it too. So as you can see, I took a bit of a cheat day. I am still far enough out where this could be allowed....even though I typically only take one every two weeks.
  I am not one of those people who say, " Oh I ate so and so, that means I need to get on the treadmill a bit longer". That ain't gonna work. Remember, 3200cal = 1 pound. So I have to get rid of whatever extra (meaning the extra calories I took in) over a period of time. I went rollerblading on Friday and did an extra workout on Saturday. It may help a little, but I probably need to do a bit of extra stuff over the next week to see a difference. Of course when I got home that night I started thinking about the damage I had done and how I probably set myself back. So this is what I came up with. If my body fat this week shows 13.5% or less, then no problem. If it is 13.9% I am still OK with that. Any higher than that, I will probably start to freak out. Not because I can't reach my goal, because I will still be ahead of where I need to be. It's because at 4.5 weeks out from the show, I am taking a family trip to Galveston for 3 nights....and I need some cushion going into that vacation. I'll let you know how that pans out.
  UPDATE PHOTOS:
I posted some pictures (in my heels) this week of me in my new suit. This is not my competition suit. As I mentioned this past week, it is really too small for me, but I think I am keeping it. Motivation to stay small. LOL Please forgive me for not brushing my hair or putting on make-up. I was in a bit of a hurry.



Above: My glutes are coming in nicely. They will be lifted and tight for show. Still have a crease, but that should be gone by showtime. I still have a lot of fat on my waist and back. That's gotta go!



I don't know why I do this pose. This is a figure pose and not a very good one. Guess I just like it.

I Love My Body, I Hate My Body!

This has been a tough week. Not for my diet, just mentally. I have been somewhat depressed, which is not normal for me. I think I am deficient in some important vitamins and minerals and most importantly Vit D. I am a horrible patient and hate to take pills. Yes, I am non-compliant in this area. I need to get back on my fish oil, vit D, probiotics, Vit C, and something else I can't remember. That's another thing that is bugging me. I can't seem to remember anything, plus I think my vision is going bad. I woke up with horrible allergies or a cold, not sure which yet, and an ulcer in my mouth. My immunity is down. If you read any of my first blogs, you may remember me talking about how being on high animal protein diets can cause your body to be acidic....which decreases your immunity. I mentioned that I usually get sick at least once during training and not in my off season. I have to take care of myself....and not just my muscles. It's hard to battle all this plus be a normal mom and wife. I am hard to be around right now, but I am trying to do better.
  I mentioned this being a tough week....yes I know, its only Wednesday. I have had a few animal crackers and gold fish, but didn't go crazy. I did have my husband fix me half of a "whatever you got in there" martini last night. I had been working on my report on a visit to one of my consumers and wouldn't you know it; I accidentally deleted the whole darn thing. I was pissed to say the least. Half a drink and I finished up the new report and that was that. No binging or anything, which is something I would have done if I wasn't on this diet.
  I got my new summer swimsuit in and I love it. Reality is, their small fits me like a XS and that just don't look right.( Yes, I know that is incorrect grammar). So now, do I send it back and go a size up, or wait till I am smaller and wear it. I don't think I have ever ordered anything on-line and it come in and fit. I am determined to have some kind of success at this on- line shopping. Nonetheless, I tried it on and I looked so bloated. I am hoping that I am just retaining water because I haven't been drinking enough today. I was on the road and don't like to make a lot of stops. All I know, I loved the way I looked on Monday and hate it today. It is a Love Hate Relationship that I have with my body....that's for sure.

8 Weeks out photos

Had a good week all in all. Friday night I had Mexican food. I ordered a big plate and was only able to eat about half. Even though I did enjoy the cheat, it was not quite as satisfying as I had hoped. Maybe the food was not great, or maybe my taste buds are less impressed. I was hoping for more of a euphoric experience. Perhaps at this point in my life I control food and not the other way around. That would make it harder to get all excited about a meal. Later that night I did have a Smirnoff Ice. I drank it in a martini glass, so I felt as if I had 3 drinks instead of one. Silly I know. I also had some Easter candy from the boy’s baskets. I think I enjoyed the chocolate most of all. That probably has more to do with the fact it's that time of the month.
  Yesterday was a break down. Not because of my diet, I don't think. I am so busy and always feel as if nothing got done and more was added to my list for the day. My boys are not minding and I am on the brink of insanity. On MWF I go to the gym, train a couple of clients, then go see a consumer at my other job. I then have to be back at the school at 1pm to pick them up. On Tuesday and Thursdays, my youngest has refused to go into the nursery at the gym, so I have to train clients on Tuesday with him in the hallway outside the weight room. Then during my workout, I have to listen to Mommy, Mommy the whole time.  This is just one more thing to add stress to an already stressed out woman. My workout is my time and now I have to share it for two days. UGGGH! I will get thru this for sure. I guess in the scheme of things it’s not that big of a deal. It just feels like it at that moment.
  Today is another day and I have had a better attitude. Going to church is always uplifting for me and it brings me back to where my focus should be.
  I did post pictures. I posted again the ones at 12 weeks out too. I think you can see a remarkable difference in my upper body and I am starting to see some changes in my legs. My shoulders are way uneven in the pictures, which means I have a tight lat. I need to get back to my ballet and stretching. I always have problems with tight lats and that will result in pain in the shoulders if I let it persist. Starting at 6 -7 weeks out, I will take photos in my heels. This will give me a better idea of where I am. Every woman looks better standing in heels.....especially 5 inch heels. LOL Wish I could where heels like that by the pool.

The first 3 photos are from this week at 8 weeks out.

The next 2 photos are 4 weeks ago at 12 weeks out.

4 Weeks Down....8 Weeks to Go!

Another week down. I am 1/3 of the way there. I soared passed my goal of 15.9% and came in at 15.5%. Just as I thought, I lost in my arms and legs. No difference in my abs. Well, that's not exactly true. I can tell I lost in the upper section of my stomach, just not where measurements are taken. I am excited. This is just the motivation I needed to keep going. I started at just over 20% 4 weeks ago. Now I get rewarded with a cheat meal this weekend. Yippee! Mexican food it is.
  I have an amazing trainer who does my body fat and teaches me tons of stuff I didn't know. Today he explained to my why I may not want to do a whole lot of my High Intensity training with really high reps. I have always been told, high reps will tone. Not true. He said going extremely high reps, like I have been doing occasionally, will actually shrink the size of my muscles. That's not what you want for competition. And since one of my critiques was to come in a bit more tone in my shoulders, I will make note of this and stay heavy with 8-10reps and at least 45 seconds rest between sets. I may throw in a day here and there just to break up the monotony of training, but certainly won't make it a part of my typical workout.
  Since going back to heavy weight lifting this week, I am not as hungry so things are a bit easier for me at the moment. Gotta push thru.

  What is the deal? I am having the hardest time my diet this time. I almost had a breakdown. I figured out that part of the problem is my schedule this year. Last year I worked in the evenings and by the time I got home, my husband had supper prepared.. This year, I am home after picking the boys up at 1pm and do all the cooking. This has gotten old quick. I think dinner tasted "different" when someone else fixed it. Sounds crazy, but it's true. Jeffrey fixed talapia and chicken tonight and I didn't feel deprived. It was really good and I actually enjoyed it. So now my plan is for my husband to prepare a couple of nights meals to help with this. I am hoping this will work.
  My workout this week is strictly hard core weight lifting? Last week was higher intensity style training. I definitely can tell the difference in my appetite. Last week I felt hungry all the time. These last two days, I haven't struggled with hunger, just not wanting to eat what I am allowed. I am anxious to see on Thursday what progress I made. I am worried it won't be what I want. I need to meet my goal each week so I don't get discouraged and say well "screw it", I am just going to eat.

Easter Sunday! I had Bison today, but did have some chocolate too. I hope that doesn't impact my loss this week. My husband did my body fat and I am down but, I am not sure if I will be down to 15.9% by Thursday. I can tell I have lost at my waist line, but that's about it. There is no reason to post my pictures this week because I think I look exactly the same. Very frustrating! It is what it is. Guess I'll know on Thursday.

Competing: A Spiritual Journey

I haven't posted since Tuesday, and it's not because I went off the deep end. I did not give in and have a beer and a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Thanks in part to a dear friend who read my post, then sent me a very encouraging text message. Since then, I have still been very hungry, but it has been manageable.
  After receiving the text message, I got to thinking about how this journey is a spiritual one too. For example, when I was training for my first figure show in 2008, I would keep my bible open and on the counter in my kitchen. Every time I would venture to the kitchen for something to eat, I would instead read a verse. I started to realize that I actually had made food my idol. I mean, while I was eating one meal, I would be thinking about my next meal. I thought about food a lot. I wasn't overweight, but I thought the same way someone who was, would.
  Last year that changed and I no longer had a problem with that. I am positive God used that training time to reveal that to me and had everything to do with me conquering that way of thinking. As God will do, if you let him, he guided me thru another self battle during last year's training. I almost quit competing all together after only completing two shows. I battled in my mind how this could possibly glorify God. I felt somewhat guilty. Maybe this is too vain. Maybe there's nothing good that could come out of this. I was torn up by this. I really love to compete. It doesn't really matter what I'm doing, I want to do the best I can and get better each time. After spending much time in prayer and relying on caring advice from my husband, I realized something.....let me rephrase that; I started believing something I already knew. God cares about the "little" things too. He knows where my heart is in all of this and I started to have peace with my decision to compete. My prayer then was and is the same now. Lord, if this is not your will, then take the desire away. Whatever way you have to do that, I am open. Knowing me, and he does, a win or a top five finish would only encourage me to keep on. LOL. So that's that. he will let me know when I am done. Until then, I give 100% and prepare to win.