If you have been reading my blog for any length of
time you are very aware I write from my own experiences. Today's blog is meant
to cause a reaction within your soul. You will either completely
"empathize" not sympathize, with me or you will feel as if you have
been CALLED OUT. That's right! Be prepared to feel something. If you are honest
with yourself you will find out if you are "that" HATER!
As an NPC competitor I endure all sorts of
reactions for what I do. Some are encouraging while others are not. Your first
thought is that this will be about the girls I meet at the competitions. Quite
the opposite. Those girls are usually very nice and supportive of one another.
We understand the hard work we have put into these shows and that respect shows
in most cases. I decided to write this when I had had enough. When I recently
uploaded a video to youtube lifting my max weight on dumbbell chest press, I
did so mainly for my friends to see. I had no idea it would bring out the
haters. Accusations that I wasn’t lifting the weight and that my workout
partner was helping too much became a big issue to someone. Ugly comments and
banter continued before I finally had to block him from my site. What was the
point in that? I meant this for fun and someone was missing that. Why? Probably
because hating on others made him feel better about HIM. I, being a bit naive I
suppose, was a bit taken back by how quickly someone was willing to say
something that would insult me instead of build me up. But then again, as I got
to thinking, this has been going on in different forms my whole life.
Most of my criticism comes from females. Jealousy
amongst us females is and always will be present. I think it's very hard for
females to truly be happy for those of the same sex. I remember being that way
myself. I think with age and doing these shows I have gained the confidence I
never had and learned to be happy with me. Now I can truly say I enjoy seeing
other women succeed. It actually empowers me. If she can do it, then so can I.
One example of being "hated" on occurred
last year. After my show, my workout partner hung some pictures of me from my
competition at the gym. Boy, the uproar that caused. They were up less than a
week. I am sure some insecure woman was threatened by my pictures being up for
her husband to see. She probably buys magazines with photo-shopped movies stars
on the front of them, but heaven forbid you put up a picture of a
"real" woman. You are a HATER! You just disguise it as
"morals" "values" or some other name that makes you feel
better. Get over yourself.
Don't forget about the "silent hater".
Let me tell you what they look like. They are one of your 350 + friends on facebook who won't even
"like" you winning a show or tell you congrats. Don't want to do
that. If you "like" it, one of your friends will see it (probably a male) and how will
that make YOU feel? You are a silent HATER. Get over yourself.
That's not the worse silent hater. How about that
person (usually a woman) who knows and is aware of your success or training for
a show but offers no Good Luck or Congrats! She will look you square in the
eyes and think about it, but nothing. Sorry to say it, but you too are a HATER.
These HATERS will preach love and kindness, but
when your success forces them to look at themselves and face their own
insecurities, then you become the bad guy. Let's face it. I am an easy target
to hate. I am young (ok maybe not so young), attractive, and having some
success. What is there to like about me. I am everything you want to be...at
least that's what you think.
Don't forget that I am human just like you. I have
had and continue to have my own insecurities and struggles. Naturally I want
people to like me.........just like you do. So the next time you whisper
something negative about me because of what I do as a competitor, STOP and
think, am I being a HATER? Instead perhaps, offer me some encouragement. Don't
assume I get enough, because as my first example shows, there is always someone
willing to HATE. Don't be "that" HATER.
