I have cried the last 3 days. I am hoping today I can resume normalcy. I am stressed beyond belief. To be honest, I don't handle stress too well to begin with.....so put a low fat diet with that and I cannot handle much of anything you throw at me. My brain is needing some DHA, that is for sure.
I am missing my workout partner this week. He is an older gentleman who is able to calm me down and give me insight on how to handle things. But I would venture to say, he would agree this has been a crappy week and a half. My mind is still fresh on the previous events I have mentioned in my blog. With that add on the following....
1. My t-shirts won't be finished till probably a week and a half out from the show. Well, I can't be selling shirts then because I have enough to focus on at that time for the show; so I decided to forgo the shirts and not worry about. That is, after I worried about it. LOL
2. My suit that I was supposed to get two Saturdays ago is still not here. Everyday it is supposed to be here and its not. On top of that, the lady called me to tell me she noticed after she mailed it, that she had a note to make a change for me that she did not do. I will likely be sending it back to her. GREAT! Who knows, maybe it will be perfect.
3. My 4 (almost 5 year old) has been refusing to go anywhere, including the nursery at the gym. Tuesday night he had a breakdown and boy was I furious. I have been dealing with this for 7 weeks now. I had to cancel on a client at that time. I felt obligated to give her a free session the next day. Money lost! My husband dealt with the situation when he got home and I hope and pray it works.
4. After training my client the next day, I picked my boys up and preceded to tell them when they would be back the next two days. I was told they were full and I could make reservations for the next week on Thursday. Excuse me, I work here and have for almost 4 years. I am training. Oh well, had to cancel on my client again because they wouldn't provide childcare. More money lost! Plus, I have to wait till my husband gets home in the evenings and go back into town to workout. Annoyed!
5. It gets worst. I go in to have my body fat checked and yep I am still sitting at 13%. What the hell? Not what I needed to hear. I need some encouragement at this point.
6. I come home yesterday anxiously waiting for my suit in the mail. I go out as soon as the mail lady delivers and nope no suit, but wait there is a letter from the private school we send our boys to. I open the letter with anticipation that there would be good news. What was I thinking? It was just a letter to follow up on the letter that we would be getting no assistance. All the money is allocated to others. Thanks for the reminder folks. That was it. Bring on the waterworks. I bet I cried for a solid hour.
Once I climbed out of my pity pool and regained my composer, I just prayed that God would work all these things out. They are small in comparison to what others are going through, but they are important to me. If its important to me, then its important to him. I know he is working out his master plan and I have to trust.
Thank goodness I ended the day on a positive note. I met with the lady doing my extensions. They are going to look great. She did a fantastic job blending in colors and I can't wait to see the final result. Finally, someone who followed through for me. That alone is exciting.
For now, my diet has become stricter. I am journaling everything I eat (even chewing gum) in order to stay solid with this diet. I need to relax because stress can cause a person's body to hold on to fat. I will have to figure in my fish oil (it has 1mg of fat per pill) on my plan and I am also now taking something for my adrenal glands. I am hoping these will help with my mental fatigue. I just have to hang in there and keep my eye on the prize. I only have 3 more weeks to go.
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